Sixty-second reflection: March 22

Today's Gospel reading has always been a little bit of a mystery to me for some reason. Maybe it's because it sounds like a story about finances, so it gets muddled in my mind because I have some form of mental block when it comes to topics like loans and interest rates. 

But of course, this is a parable about forgiveness, with a healthy gut punch at the end: "So will my heavenly Father do to you, unless each of you forgives your brother from the heart." Gulp. So I have to pay attention to this. I asked God what he wanted to show me today, and this was the passage that struck me:

He seized him and started to choke him, demanding,

‘Pay back what you owe.’

Falling to his knees, his fellow servant begged him,

‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’

But he refused. 

But his own debt was cancelled.

The king was moved with compassion for the guy and forgave his enormous debt, so there was nothing to pay back. The loan was forgiven. So why shake down the other guy? Greed? Bad temper? (Maybe he was hungry, I do a lot of stupid stuff when I'm hungry.)

It backfired on him, though. The king found out and then, instead of "just" being sold as a slave, he was turned over to the goon squad and forced to pay back an unpayable debt. Which Jesus says, is what will happen to me if I don't forgive.

I go to confession owing God what I can never pay back. When I make a good confession, make my act of contrition from the heart, and the priest absolves me, that unpayable debt is cancelled. I am forgiven. But, if I walk out of the confessional a forgiven person and then find someone who I think "owes" me, maybe from some slight annoyance, or a comment I took the wrong way, or even from a bigger hurt, and I want to make them "pay," I am this stupid guy who had it all and blew it. 

Forgiveness is a tricky topic. I mean the passage even starts out with Peter essentially asking Jesus, "no, seriously, how many times do I have to forgive someone?" Jesus' answer was anything but a joke.

All the times. All the times we must forgive. 

So what I say to Jesus today is, "I do forgive; help me in my unforgiveness!"

Full readings here.